Terrible Friends and Stupid Singapore Trips
published at
8:16 PM
You know how I always say I'm a terrible friend? I say it because I really am. I'm not the type that remembers birthdays, goes out of their way to buy presents, or keeps in touch if you fly away to another country. I've struggled to do all of the above almost my entire life, because if I didn't the person would feel offended and blah blah blah BLAH. Pfft. I don't really care anymore.
1) If you didn't get me anything for my birthday, I'm definitely not gonna feel obliged to go along with the crowd (peer pressure and all that) and get you a present.
2) Presents/gifts are seriously overrated, and people shouldn't get offended because it's totally the other person's RIGHT to either get you something or not.
3) If you're currently in another country and I haven't contacted you, it's because I don't do snail mail, I avoid MSN and Facebook like the plague, and I'm a lazy ass.
4) I told you. I'm a bad friend.
5) People are annoying. Even God at one point regretted making man. I totally agree with him. He should have NEVER made ANY of us. I'm so happy the fifth Kong never made it into this world. So happy.
I'm getting less interesting by the minute.
I'm losing any interest I had before in living.
I mean, in all seriousness, it's not depression or anything. I just.. even as I was walking home today, in my head I almost came to the conclusion that life on earth, in Christ, etc. has no meaning or purpose whatsoever. Then I realized I'd better stop thinking before I backslide or something. Lols.
Gosh, people nowadays have so many things to worry about- so many things to do. They're so busy with their jobs and appearances that they never slow down and look at the big picture. What on earth am I here for? Why am I walking home right now? Why am I going to school tomorrow? What is the ultimate purpose in all this? Is it to be remembered by one and all? I don't want that. Yeesh, I don't really want much of anything right now. I don't want to go to Singapore. I'm not excited. I wish I was still five and innocent. I don't believe in the whole "we learn from our trials and it's essentially good for us" theory. God meant the world to have no sin in it whatsoever. Which means, we're actually not supposed to have any trials. But why do we have them now? Because the first stupid man and the first stupid woman made some stupid mistakes and screwed it up for the rest of us. Hah. What a joke. In almost every single movie I watch, there we are- destroying each other. Killing each other, with words, swords, bombs, and every other weapon imaginable- visible and invisible. Hurting each other, murdering each other over and over again.
Ahaha, I'm so, so screwed up. You have no idea the state my mind is in.
I'd better stop now. Sorry if you read all that.
1) If you didn't get me anything for my birthday, I'm definitely not gonna feel obliged to go along with the crowd (peer pressure and all that) and get you a present.
2) Presents/gifts are seriously overrated, and people shouldn't get offended because it's totally the other person's RIGHT to either get you something or not.
3) If you're currently in another country and I haven't contacted you, it's because I don't do snail mail, I avoid MSN and Facebook like the plague, and I'm a lazy ass.
4) I told you. I'm a bad friend.
5) People are annoying. Even God at one point regretted making man. I totally agree with him. He should have NEVER made ANY of us. I'm so happy the fifth Kong never made it into this world. So happy.
I'm getting less interesting by the minute.
I'm losing any interest I had before in living.
I mean, in all seriousness, it's not depression or anything. I just.. even as I was walking home today, in my head I almost came to the conclusion that life on earth, in Christ, etc. has no meaning or purpose whatsoever. Then I realized I'd better stop thinking before I backslide or something. Lols.
Gosh, people nowadays have so many things to worry about- so many things to do. They're so busy with their jobs and appearances that they never slow down and look at the big picture. What on earth am I here for? Why am I walking home right now? Why am I going to school tomorrow? What is the ultimate purpose in all this? Is it to be remembered by one and all? I don't want that. Yeesh, I don't really want much of anything right now. I don't want to go to Singapore. I'm not excited. I wish I was still five and innocent. I don't believe in the whole "we learn from our trials and it's essentially good for us" theory. God meant the world to have no sin in it whatsoever. Which means, we're actually not supposed to have any trials. But why do we have them now? Because the first stupid man and the first stupid woman made some stupid mistakes and screwed it up for the rest of us. Hah. What a joke. In almost every single movie I watch, there we are- destroying each other. Killing each other, with words, swords, bombs, and every other weapon imaginable- visible and invisible. Hurting each other, murdering each other over and over again.
Ahaha, I'm so, so screwed up. You have no idea the state my mind is in.
I'd better stop now. Sorry if you read all that.
6 Comments:
I suppose we're all just trying to survive. We'd kill to survive, even if it meant another person had to die. Humans are just so awesome. I'm in awe of how totally screwed up a person can actually get. Take a good, hard look at the world and tell me it isn't true?
Hey Rach. Why so emo post now a days??? Don't worry. You are a good friend to many people. People who are your good friends like you just the way you are. =) You don't use msn or facebook makes you all the more special. Ur blog post come at the same time as my problems. I am having problems in school. I am getting frustrated at my schoolwork and that I am the slowest person in class. I may have to retake my year 10 again. I felt like giving up and going back to Cambodia but after some talking to my friend's mom I realized that I may not be so good as other. I realized that God had a plan but I may not be able to see it yet. Well, so that is my problem. Hope that you feel better after you read this. "smile" Haha. Just enjoy your trip to Singapore. There are many things to do without spending money. Hehe. There is alot of free stuff if you know where to look. Tim out.
Oh man. Wrong sentence. People who are your good friends like you just the way you are.
Normally i'm hardly optimistic on stuff, but instead i usually see the worst scenario and tell myself it couldn't get worse than that.=p well what i'm trying to say is 'Expect the worst, pray for the best, and hope for the rest'. Hope this helps and we'll be there for you when you need us= =....
Thank you.
P.S.
Yeah, I figured that out quite some time ago. EXPECT THE WORST. Then you'll never be disappointed.
Hey Rach,
hmmm. ok.
First up, regarding your connection on being a good friend and buying gifts:I thought it was really sweet and thoughtful of you to get those key chains for me(the Twilight -moon- one then ANOTHER one after it broke =[) Cos to a point, I do agree with you, it IS person's RIGHT to give others gifts. Which was why your gifts touched me so =]
Ok. Secondly, and im going to be prefectly honest from here on.
Yes, people are annoying, yeah, everyone is screwed up, and yes, a lot of people don't slow down and look at the big picture. But then again, what's the big picture? Is the big picture really all that nice, or realy or that important than the pointed view we have now? We each have our own reasons for our purpose in life. And as the selfish people we are, we only care about ourselves. So we shouldn't judge how other people live their lives. We just deal with ours. And we just find out our own purpose in life. I don't know what yours is. Only you can say that. And maybe one day, you'll figure it out and find the reason to live and enjoy life. But until then, you can choose the way you feel about life. This is something I have learned just this year. You can choose to be happy, mostly by ignoring all the bad things and making your own happiness, or you could choose to concentrate on just the screwed up parts of life and feel that life isn't worth it I guess.
I know I'm not really close to you, but I do hope that at least something I have just said helped, even a little bit.
And btw - you're really not that terrible a friend you know. Look at all the people who's trying to help you. They care.
=]
- Karl
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